In John 2:4, was Jesus abrupt to his mother?

This text is from a transcript of a talk by David Gooding, entitled ‘Four Journeys to Jerusalem’ (2009).

John 2:4 is not so abrupt in Greek as it sounds in English. In English, we wouldn't think of saying, 'Woman', to the Queen; but you would in Greek. It is not disrespectful, and it is certainly not slang. You could say it to a queen. Indeed, the Greek gynai, which is here in the text, is the Indo-European equivalent of our word 'queen'. It is where our word comes from. It is a term you would use of a very stately lady.

On the other hand, it is very formal. He was putting a distance between her and himself because this was the first act of his public ministry: 'This, the first of his signs' (John 2:11). The point had to be made, and some of you will see why that is important more constantly than I do, because of where you are labouring. We don't come through Mary and rely upon praying to her.

There is an old story in some cultures that the father is a very distant figure, and the children find it easier to come to the father through the mother; and so Christ is a very distant figure and so is God, and so isn't it nice that we can come through Mary? That is a slander on the person of Christ. He stands and says, 'Come to me . . . I am gentle and lowly in heart' (Matthew 11:28–29).